Bridal Show Plan of Attack

Attending a bridal show? You'll need a plan of attack
so you can see everything and get the most out of the
show. As much as you want to see all the vendors and
get ideas, the vendors want to meet YOU.

Bring a friend with you. It doesn't have to be your fiance,
it can be your mother or maid of honor. Your friend is your
extra pair of eyes and ears.

Bring along some pre printed address labels.
When you want additional information from a vendor
or to sign up for free prizes and giveaways, simply
put your sticker on the entry or sign in sheet. You'll
save a lot of time!

Bring along a tote bag with a notebook. The tote
will be an easy way to carry around all the literature and
flyers from the vendors. The notebook will be to jot down
ideas, take notes, write down appointments with vendors
and take down phone numbers.

Bring along a digital camera. Snap photos for ideas of
cakes, centerpieces and anything else that is notable.
Don't trust your memory, you'll see so much it will
get all jumbled in your brain.

Dress comfortably. Leave the coat in the car or at
a coat check. Wear comfortable walking shoes because
you will need to cover a lot of area and you'll be on your
feet.

Take time to talk to the vendors. Some vendors will
just "click" with you, others not so.

Every bridal show has show specials. This might be
discounts, free items with purchase and more. Make
note of the specials and book interviews if you
are interested in their product or service.

Don't be afraid to ask for references.

Don't be afraid to ask a vendor whose work you
like if they are having a show special.

Don't be pressured into any purchase at the show.
High pressure usually equals a big mistake.

Take a break. Have a bottled water, cup of coffee
or just sit and talk to your show partner and ask their
opinions and input on what you've seen.

Have fun!

New Years Resolutions for the Bride To Be

I will be organized because an organized bride is
the driving force with a well orchestrated wedding.
I will buy or get a free wedding planner and keep
it up to date.

I realize that this wedding is just not all about me.
I will take into account my fiance's wishes and plans
because this wedding is HIS wedding, too.

I realize that a wedding is a blending of two families
so I will try and keep family harmony and my sense of
humor intact.

I will work within my budget. When I save money in one
category, I can roll the savings into another category to
get something I really want.

I will be reasonable in my plans. I don't need to outdo
my friends or relatives weddings. I won't make
demands that can't be met.

I will be nice to my fiance's family because I 'm joining
their family. I want to be welcomed with open arms.
My new mother in law can be my best friend or
worst enemy, the choice is mine. Regardless of how
I feel about her, I will respect her because if it weren't
for her, I wouldn't have my fiance.

I will take into consideration my bridesmaids financial
situation when I ask them to pay for their dress, shoes,
bridal shower, etc. I will choose the bridesmaid dress
with their body shapes and budget in mind.

I will not talk about my wedding 24/7. I will not live,
eat and breathe my wedding 24/7. Nor will I get
upset when my friends and fiance don't want to
hear about it on a daily basis.

I will not be a Bridezilla. I will not have temper
tantrums, blow ups and be a drama queen. To find
out if I'm turning into Bridezilla, I'll take the
Bridezilla test.

I'll remember that its not about the wedding,
that its about the marriage. The wedding is just
a party, the marriage is real life. My life.

I will take well meaning wedding suggestions
without getting angry or taking it as criticism.
I will smile, tell them that I'll take it under
consideration and then forget about it.

I will remember that when I talk nonstop about
my wedding, that the person I'm talking to will
want to talk about their wedding. Paybacks
are fair play. If I don't want to hear about their
wedding, I won't talk about mine.

I know that making a guest list is a give and
take proposition and negotiations may be
necessary between families.

I will interview vendors and ask for references
before signing any contracts. I will not book
a vendor just because they are the cheapest.
I will check out their work before I sign anything.

I will not be pressured into buying anything I don't
want or need for my wedding. I will learn to just
say no firmly. High pressure sales tactics usually
mean I'm making a mistake. I'll take time to think,
if I need the product or service, I'll be back.

I will not yell, scream and threaten my vendors.
Any problems can be worked out in advance with
a phone call and polite conversation.

I will call my vendors to check on my wedding
progress before the wedding to make sure we
are on the same page. This goes back to being
organized.

When I get stressed out, I will take a wedding break.
I will take a walk, a bubble bath or play with my dog.
I will NOT call my fiance and cry. I will not melt down,
I will keep things in perspective. Tomorrow is another
day.

I will not demand a huge bridal shower or a big
bachelorette party. I will be happy with whatever
I get. The shower is not my problem, nor should
I have anything to do with planning the shower.
Its a party for me, and the less I know, the better.

I won't put demands on myself that I can't
reasonably attain. I can't expect to lose 4 dress
sizes in 6 months without a lot of sacrifice and
stress. I will do what I need to do remembering
that a dress is just a size to zip and the size
is not plastered on the outside of my dress.

I will remember that the wedding will come to pass
and I'll remain standing. So I'll smile, laugh and
enjoy myself in the process. I'll maintain my sense
of humor no matter how hard I have to try!

Ebay Your Weddng!

Ebay your wedding!

Have you thought about using Ebay to save money
on your wedding? Its an open secret that a lot
of savy brides use to find unique wedding items
and save a lot of money doing it.

There are a lot of brick and mortar stores
selling on Ebay. Bridal salons, jewelers,
paper and invitation stores just to name a few.
My nephew bought his wife's
wedding rings on Ebay from a jeweler and saved
several thousand dollars! The rings are gorgeous,
he couldn't have afforded them if he walked into
the store.

I saw a $400 BRAND NEWParis tiara selling
for $49.00!
A BRAND NEW$300 Malis Henderson veil selling
for $99.00!
A $79 crinoline for $39.00!
New silk wedding shoes by Grace that retail
for $149, up for bid starting at $25.00!!

A Casablanca Wedding Dress that retails for
$1200 selling for $599, you special order it and
the seller is a full service bridal salon. That's
a $600 savings, people!

What about ordering Tee shirts for all
the members of the wedding party?

Custom designed favors?

And what about men's wedding bands? I've
seen titanium bands for $29.00. That's a
steal (steel...get it?)

There are unique cake toppers, favors,
custom wedding candles and more things
than you can possibly imagine.
You have to check it out!

I ordered custom candle favors for my
niece's bridal shower. Not only were they
unique AND personalized, they were a
huge hit with the recipients. And guess
what? I paid so little for them I'm
actually embarrassed to tell you the cost.

What are you waiting for? Ebay your wedding!

Getting Engaged Over The Holidays? Here's a plan!

The holidays are a huge time for engagements. If there is a
ring in your future, here's what you need to do to start the
wedding planning.

Of course you're excited. You need to call everyone
and shout it from the rooftops. Do what you have to
do as far as announcing it, but put the brakes on
immediate wedding plans. Take a week or two for
the excitement to subside so you don't make any
planning mistakes. Don't immediately rush out and
sign contracts! Enjoy the moment!

You and your fiance need to set a date. Together.
One that mutually will fit into your life.

You need to agree on a place. Whether its a church,
a garden or a destination wedding, you need to discuss the
location.

You need to define your wedding. Formal, informal,
reception hall, event center, backyard barbecue.

You need to set a budget and determine who
is paying for what part of the wedding.
Don't assume your parents are willing to foot the bill
for a fairytale extravaganza or that his parents are going
to host the rehearsal dinner, provide the liquor and pay
for the honeymoon. Talk to your parents individually to
see what, if any, financial help they are willing OR able to give.

Attend bridal shows. January and February are the
prime time for bridal shows. This will give you a chance to
do a face to face with all sorts of wedding vendors. Bridal shows
offer discounts for bookings either at the show or by making
an appointment after the show. You can compare florists,
DJ's, makeup artists and more. Look at the wedding dresses
in the show. Make appointments to interview
vendors. You SHOULD take the time after the show to
look at photographer's and florists' portfolios
BEFORE you sign any contracts. If its a caterer, make an
appointment for a tasting. Make an appointment to
try on wedding dresses.

Get references. Ask for names of previous customers.
Ask your friends who just got married if they would
recommend their vendors. Call the Better Business Bureau.

Realize that weddings take time to pull together.
While I am advocating NOT jumping into any contracts
or being pressured into a purchase, you also need to
order your wedding items or book your
vendors in a timely manner.
You'll need to order your wedding dress at least 6 months
in advance. Wedding dresses have a lot of hand beading
that takes time to produce. They are like snowflakes,
no two are exactly alike.
Many vendors are booked in more than a year in advance.
Don't expect everyone to be available for you in
an instant's notice.
PLAN AHEAD!

Make a decision, cross it off your list and to
on to the next item at hand.
Once you've settled on a wedding item, stop shopping
and purchase it. Don't second guess yourself. Don't even
think about changing your mind. Your first impulse
is usually the correct one. If you are making a horrible
mistake, someone ,whether it be a family member or
your wedding vendor, will tell you its a mistake.
I would never let anyone walk out of my bridal shop
in an unflattering dress or blend horrible colors for the
bridesmaids. I'll tell you upfront that its wrong.

If a vendor is high pressuring you to buy, RUN!
There is a national wedding dress chain that is notorious for
high pressure sales. The sales consultants are
commission and under pressure to sell. Not a week goes by
where a bride doesn't come in and tell us of her regret for buying
her wedding dress under pressure. Don't knuckle under to
pressure by any vendor. If time is a constraint, they may be telling
you the truth. You can't magically produce a dress, but
if you have 6 or more months, don't cave to pressure.

PS CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!
Comments or questions? Fire away!

So You Hate Your Engagement Ring...

I just finished reading an article in Modern Bride about women who were
disappointed in their engagement rings. It was too big,
it was too small, it wasn't "me". Frankly, I've never seen a
diamond I didn't like, but that's just me, I've always been
distracted by shiny objects. (That's the reason I give for being
in the bridal dress biz, I get to be surrounded by shiny objects all day long!)

I had just spoken to a jeweler who said that brides don't want
anything under 2 carats for their MAIN stone. And they want
flawless stones. He said that smaller sized stones just don't sell.
I was shocked because in today's economy, how many men can afford a
stone that size? Do you really need to start your marriage in debt because
you just HAD to have a big ring?

I noticed that the rings I've been seeing on the fingers of the newly
engaged gals in the bridal salon are humongous. I've actually wondered
if they were real. Maybe they aren't?

So what should you do if you HATE your ring? You can send it to
me where it will be loved, cherished and enjoyed. ;)
Seriously, if you THINK a ring might be in your future,
how about giving him some guidance? Tell him what you want,
men aren't mind readers. He'd probably be happy for some starting
point. Show him pictures, the bridal magazines are wallpapered with
pictures of rings. Point out rings in the jewelry shop you like.

Or tell him point blank that you've always dreamed of shopping
together for your wedding ring. Then pick what you WANT and stop whining.

Or talk to his mother and tell HER what you want.
She may know what he's got in mind and you can tell her what
you'd like. Or have your mother talk to him.
Mom's do have some clout.

Some gals never get an engagement ring. When I got engaged,
we couldn't afford a diamond big enough to be seen by the
human eye. We did matching gold custom wedding bands and I was
happy. He surprised me when he could afford a diamond.
I got to choose what I wanted and it was smaller than what he
picked out for me. What was I thinking?

Other gals get small rings and cherish them. I've seen brides
gush over a quarter of a carat diamond with the gusto of a gal
who just got a rock from Cartier's.

Its all about your perception. I really want to say be happy for what
you've got. I really want to say to stop being greedy and trying
to out do your friends. I want to say that the ring isn't important,
its the thought behind the ring. But I'm not going to say it.
I'm going to say that if the ring is the most important part of the
wedding, you've got your priorities screwed up.

Wedding Day Hairstyles Customized Just for You!

This is the perfect tool for brides to plan their wedding hairstyle. I have a lot of brides who have used it and love it. Plan your style, print it out and take it to your stylist and have a hairstyle preview before your wedding. You can try different updo's and styles you've never considered.

Do you realize how much time it takes to practice hairstyles without knowing how you are going to look with the finished product? You can upload your photo so you get the exact look you want without a lot of wasted time. Besides, this is fun!!

Try it, its the best way to try lots of great hairstyles without sitting in a salon
for hours and hours. My favorite part is how you can change your haircolor or add highlights without actually doing it. I was surprised to see how much better I'd look with lighter highlights, so I went out and did it!! And you know what, it looks BETTER than I'd imagined.

Visit TheHairStyler.com Today!

Wedding Traditions, Do you know what they mean?

Do you know the history of wedding traditions that we incorporate into our
wedding celebrations? What about wedding superstitions?

Here's one historical note that I didn't know about the wedding cake. Guests would bring cakes to the wedding celebration and they would be stacked. The bride and groom would attempt to kiss each other over the top of the cakes. If they kissed, it was considered good luck.
The Romans broke cakes over the head of the bride in order to make her fertile.

For an interesting read, Wedding Chaos has a three part series on wedding traditions and superstitions. They cover everything from the stag (bachelor party), hen (bachelorette party) to the tradition of dropping flower petals. Lots of interesting stuff!

Keep the Focus on the Marriage, Less on Wedding Planning

Too many brides put more emphasis on wedding planning and less time marriage planning. The focus of the wedding is the MARRIAGE. Its two people joining their lives together. The theory is that it is to be 'till death of one of the spouses. What a novel concept. Lets stay together through sickness and health, richer and poorer IF we survive the wedding planning.

I've met brides who never mention their fiance. Ever. This gal seems to be more into the IDEA of planning a wedding, having a wedding, being the center of attention and being the BRIDE than the reality of being married.

Marriage isn't glamorous. Its not always fun. Its not always romance and roses. Some days its kids puking in their beds and a sick whining spouse. Some days its routine and boring. Other days its fun and laughs. Its a foundation for your life and your family. Its making memories together. And it really is fun knowing your best friend is waiting for you at the end of the day.

You need to make plans for your marriage with the same zeal you use for planning your wedding. You have to have the same value system. You have to agree on finances and if and when you want to start a family. You should agree on religious beliefs before marriage. And if you have problems or disagreements in this area, then you need to have premarital counseling BEFORE you start planning a wedding. Divorce is NOT fun.

You don't have to agree on politics, sports teams, favorite tv shows or music. Its how you deal with your differences that makes all the difference in a happy marriage and a failed wedding.

And if ALL your emphasis is on the wedding and not the marriage, your priorities are
backwards.

Recycling an Old Bridesmaid Dress Into A Holiday Dress

We all (including moi) have a closet full of old bridesmaid dresses. With a little ingenuity and some alterations, you can take that monstrosity out of your closet and rework it into a dress perfect for a holiday party. Isn't it all about recycling and saving money? And you've already got the dress and it fits!

If you have any two piece bridesmaids dresses, you've hit the mother lode. Pair the bridesmaid top with a cute black skirt, leather pants, evening pants or even jeans.

You can add a tailored jacket or cardigan and wear the bridesmaid top as a camisole.

You can hem the skirt to tea length or knee length and wear it with a holiday twin set, tuxedo jacket or sparkly beaded sweater.

If you have a full length dress, have it shortened to tea length or knee length. Add or subtract the spaghetti straps. You can even buy cute beaded bra straps to snap onto a strapless bra.

If the dress has a ribbon sash belt, take it off and replace it with a holiday belt in silver or a tailored belt.

Remove this ribbon STAT!! The ribbon makes it "bridesmaidy". A tailored belt or a sparkly belt will take it out of the realm of weddings. And forget these ugly shoes!


It the dress is poofy, cut out the crinoline and have it shortened and the excess fabric on the sides tapered in to a more manageable width.

If the dress is black, have it hemmed into a classic little black dress.

If your dress is black AND tea length, accessorize, accessorize, accessorize! Think classic silver shoes, jewelry and a silver broach. You probably already have the basics in your closet. Or pair the black with red shoes and purse. Cute and stylish!

If your dress has long streamers in the back, have them removed.

Remove every bow on the dress, don't ask questions, just DO it! ;)

If it has a sweep train, have it cut off.

If the dress has a fuller skirt, you can have the dress cut into a short bubble skirt.

If the dress is ruffled and poofed, just trash it or sell it to a drag queen on Ebay.

I Screwed Up, I'm The Boss, Its My Neck

OK, I screwed up. I'm self employed. Everything that goes wrong is my fault. I take the blame, I face the consequences. Even when I don't deserve it. And this crap is getting old fast.

The Cliff notes version:
Mother of the bride (MOB) brings in dress to be cleaned and preserved. I send it off. Dress comes back to me uncleaned. Some mumbo jumbo about the plant being unable to process it at this time. (Turns out they just sold the company).

I take the dress to a local cleaner who says all 5 locations are closing at the end of the month. I tell MOB the truth, promise it will ship tomorrow to a different plant. I pick up the dress. I can't move. Can't drive home, end up in the ER with a ruptured disc. Talk of surgery, lots of pain, can't sleep, can't walk. End up doing 6 weeks of rehab. I can't work, but I have an amazing staff who will carry on.

Amazing staff puts the dress in the closet in a solid colored bag and forgets about it. I find out the dress has been in the closet for 6 weeks, I'm not happy. MOB screams at me for 15 minutes. I apologize profusely. I refund her money. She's livid. Her last words to me were "You are going to pay." I feel lower than a snake's belly.

She'll berate me to everyone . Do I deserve it? Yes and No. Yes, because I am self employed and I'm responsible. Self employed people can't afford to get sick, take a day off, or a vacation. Everyone's mistake becomes MY mistake. No, because some things happened over which I had no control. But I'll take the rap because I should have remembered.

Moral of the story: There are two sides to every story. The one you'll hear blabbed all over town and the internet and the real story.

For all you shoe Fashionistas!

Fashion is a strange thing. It can be functional or it can be frivolous. Sometimes fashion makes me laugh. Sometimes its just ridiculous.

I've been a slave to shoe fashions. I admit it. I've worn shoes that could break the spirit any human being. I've suffered with shin splints, blisters and foot pain. Shoes and handbags are my addiction. I have shoes I've never worn, nor will I ever wear because I just had to have them. They don't fit my lifestyle unless I get another life as a fashion model. And at 5 foot tall, it ain't gonna happen, baby. I confess, I'm addicted to buying shoes. None are practical, some are what my husband would call "slut" shoes. What would you expect from a man who actually has a pair of wing tips in his closet? I mean, who even knows what a wing tip shoe actually is?

I call them fash-on, my fashion. And I'm happy they are just taking up space in my closet.

These shoes WON'T be in my closet, I do have SOME standards:

How novel, take the box and fashion a shoe. Its a two-fer for the creative! They are a little too "boxy" for me. ;)

Another use for your shoe box! And if you live in an area with snow, you can use the toe to dig a path for yourself.

These are just too scary for words. Yikes! Where is the rest of the bear?

Here's an example of what a guy can do with too much time on his hands, some superglue and a whole lot of wine corks. Bet he's still proud of this one!

I came across more at Divine Caroline and its too good not to pass on. Some are real head smackers. These are some WILD shoes. Check it out!

Target Wedding Dresses, Isaac Mizrahi, What are you thinking?

A Cleveland news station did a news story on how to get a cheap wedding dress and featured Target wedding dresses. It was all I could do not to gag. Did Isaac Mizrahi sell his soul to design these dresses at this price point?

OK...you want a cheap wedding dress. Order it from Tar-jay and you will get a cheap wedding dress. You won't get style. You won't get quality. You'll get a dress.

Don't get me wrong, I shop Target. But I can't imagine ANYONE bragging to their friends that they bought their wedding dress at Target.

Back to the Cleveland news cast. They showed a silk cowl neck dress up close and I freaked..the dress had SNAGS in it. Since there are all qualities of silk, I'm guessing this wasn't the best quality because bridal silk doesn't snag all that easily. The dress was only lined to above the knee on the model, and you could see the lining through the dress! That, my friend, is major cost cutting!

The dresses were styles that are totally passe...as in outdated. The styles just don't sell anymore. And the cuts are unflattering. I know, I dress brides every day. One style has a scoop neck and a gathered tulle skirt at the waistline. That adds at least 20 pounds to the silhouette. Lord, who wants to look fatter on their wedding day?

Isaac, I know you can do better. This collection sucks.

Your Wedding Coach: Every Bride Should Have A Wedding Emergency Kit

Every bride needs a wedding emergency kit for her wedding day. It would also be an amazing gift from the bridesmaids to the bride.

You should include the following:

Needle and thread in the color of your wedding dress.
Safety pins
Dress Tape
Scissors
Nail file and nail clippers
Flesh colored bandaids
Nail polish the same color as you are wearing.
A compact with powder to keep the shine off your face in the pictures.
A lipstick and lip balm or gloss
Waterproof mascara
Pain reliever
Eye drops
Antacids
Tissues
Facial blotters (they blot up excess oils on the skin without disturbing your makeup.)
Hairspray
Hairpins if your hair is in an updo
Small bottle of club soda for stain removal and a white washcloth to use to blot the stain

Pack it all up in a tote bag and keep it nearby the day of the wedding. If you are prepared, you'll avoid any major disasters. Have a happy wedding day!