Thursday, January 31, 2008

Wedding Cake Porn, Lifesize Wedding Replica Cake

Maybe its me. I've never had the urge to have
myself replicated in any media, especially as a
life sized cake. I always figured one of me
was enough for the world. Besides, if it was
really true to life, then you'd have to do
cake love handles. And I'm in denial about
that....and what I can't see behind me,
doesn't exist. God save me from my
mirrored dressing rooms!

This bride's dream was to replicate herself
in her wedding cake. And she did. Total
wedding cake porn.

The best comment I've read on this subject
is here: Have Your Bride And Eat Her Too.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

The Bride & Groom's First Dance

The First Dance at the reception as
husband and wife is a tradition. Couples
usually waltz to "their song". But fun
couples are keeping the dance and tweaking
the tradition to make it memorable.
Have fun with it! I love it!

And as a PS...why don't I ever get
invited to weddings this fun?

The Grand Master:

Starts slow, then it really ROCKS!

Love this one!

Coping With Wedding Stress, How to Relax and Be Happy During Your Wedding Planning

Picture from the Brides of March

Wedding planning is stressful. Wedding
planning can cause the most laid back couple
to flare up and combust. When the wedding
is causing you to stress out and lose sleep,
its time to take action!

Remember, the wedding is a big party.
Its a celebration of the marriage of two people.
Its not a competition to have the best wedding.
Its a party. It's just a really BIG party.

Take a wedding planning break. Take a couple
of days off to decompress, relax and rejuvenate.
Spend quality time alone with your fiance and
make a pact that you won't mention the wedding.

Take a long walk in the sunshine with your dog.
Jump on the treadmill when the weather is bad.
Sign up for an aerobics class.
Take a yoga class. Not only will you learn relaxation
techniques, you'll elongate your body
and increase flexibility.

Read a book or magazine.
Take a bubble bath with candles and play soft music
so you can relax.
Give yourself a facial and pedicure.

Schedule a massage. Or better yet, schedule a couples
massage at a local spa. He's part of the wedding planning,
too, and if you are stressed, well, you get the idea!

Plan shopping day with your best friend along with
lunch in a hot new bistro.

Sign up for a dance class.

Swim at the Y.

Put on a strip aerobics or belly dance DVD.
Great cardio workout, more fun than doing
regular aerobics.

Go to the local park and swing on the swings. Take along
your iPod for the walking path, have a picnic and just
spend the afternoon being carefree.

When the stress starts up again, repeat the above.
Make a pact with yourself to be happy and roll with
whatever life throws your way. This, too, shall pass.

After The Bridal Shows, Here's A Plan!

You've attended the bridal shows.
You've seen lots of bridal fashions during
the fashion show. You've gotten ideas,
you've seen samples of photographers work.
You've swooned over bouquets and found
a cake that you love. You saw the most
adorable favors and totally unique
invitations. Now what?

If you read my post Bridal
Shows Plan of Attack
, you are ready to

Go over your notes from the show. If you didn't
take notes, go over your literature from the show.
What did you like?
What did you love?
What didn't you like?
Was there a vendor whose work you admired?
Was there a vendor whose personality and yours
didn't mesh?

Make appointments with vendors you liked.
Interview them BEFORE you sign any contracts.
We recommend you see a sample of their work
and ask for references. Call the BBB to see
if they have any complaints on file before
you sign. Reread the contract and make sure
you understand what you are signing BEFORE
you sign.

Some vendors book up fast. If they aren't
available for your date, ask them to recommend
someone and then interview that vendor. Or go
to your second and third choices from the show.
When you find someone whose work you admire,
you are in sync with them and the price fits
in your budget, don't wait forever, book them
so you aren't disappointed.

Make an appointment with dress salons to try on
bridal fashions. Your dress will dictate the
tone of the wedding. Pick your dress first,
then the bridesmaids. By now you will have
a theme and a color in mind, so the planning

When you visit your florist, bring a picture
of your dress and the maids dress so they can
advise you on flowers that will compliment your
dresses. Also bring a color swatch for them as
a point of reference. Bring magazine pictures of
flowers and bouquets you like to the interview.
The more prepared you are, the better the
communication. Remember, flowers in season are
less expensive than out of season flowers that
need to be flown in. Be honest with your
budget and be realistic.

Be organized! Tackle one area at a time, one
thing off your list will keep things moving
smoothly. Don't attempt to do it all in one
day, it won't happen!

Rita Rudner on Marriage, Relationships & Children

Time for a humor break, a break from wedding
planning! These quotes are all by comedienne
Rita Rudner about marriages, relationships
and children. Rita is happily married, so take
the quotes as tongue in cheek humor.

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts

Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love.
I'd stepped in it a few times.

I love being married. It's so great to find that one special
person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy, the first
question I ask myself is: is this the man I want my
children to spend their weekends with?

My Favorite!
Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared
for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get
married and I didn't want him to.

My mother buried three husbands - and
two of them were only napping.

The time you spend grieving over a man should
never exceed the amount of time you actually spent
with him.

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little
feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and
you get more feet.

When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his
first name was Always.

I know I want to have children while my parents
are still young enough to take care of them.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Wedding Q: My Sister's Fiance Is Cheating!

Amy writes: My sister and her fiance are planning a fall wedding.
My parents are paying a wad of cash
for this wedding. "Seth" is cheating on my sister with
a woman
who lives in the same apartment complex
as my boyfriend and
other mutual friends. "Seth" has been seen coming in late in
evening and leaving in the morning wearing different
His friends think he's been living there part time.
How do I or
do I tell my sister? She needs him gone!"
Future Sister In Law of a Scum Bag Cheater

Dear Sis,
One thing is clear. There is going to be a major
blow up and major repercussions. How much do
you want to be involved in the center of it all?

Playing Devil's Advocate for a moment: Perhaps
your sister is actually the innocent "other woman".
Could he have been involved with the woman in
the apartment BEFORE he was involved with your
sister? He's cheating on two different women, and
chances are that neither of them know about the other.
Woman in apartment could be as innocent as
your sister, and who knows, may be in for as
much surprise and heartbreak as your sis. Both of
them are getting only half a relationship. Both
deserve better.

While I think your sister needs to know before
she walks down the aisle with Seth Scum or
facing a wedding canceled at the last minute,
she needs to hear it from the horse's mouth.

I'd have a talk with Seth Scum with my boyfriend
and other friends present. I'd tell him you are aware of
the woman in the apartment and he has two weeks to
tell your sister about her. And if in two weeks she
isn't told, you all are going to tell her and your parents
what's been going on behind her back. Tell him you
are giving him the benefit of the doubt. He owes none
of you an explanation, but he owes HER an explanation
before she finds out from someone else.

OK....we need some help on this one. Do you think
this advice is spot on? Do you have recommendations
we can give her? Have you been in the same situation?
What should she do? Leave a comment!!

Wedding Q: What To Do About A PIA Bridesmaid?

The Bridesmaid, by John Phillip, painted in 1860

Wedding Q...uestion: "Hi, I have a
bridesmaid that is causing trouble in my
wedding. She hates the dress, she refuses
to participate in any wedding activities,
she talks smack about my fiance. What
should I do?"

My first impulse would be to tell you to
kick her to the curb, but there is something
going on with her. She may be jealous,
she may be afraid of losing your friendship
once you are married. Maybe the problem
is financial. Or maybe she may just enjoy
being disruptive.

Take time to talk to her alone. Take her to
lunch and ask her in a nice non confrontational
way about the problem. Reassure her that your
friendship is important and just because you
are getting married, it doesn't mean she won't be
a part of your life.

Tell her you are willing to listen
to any thing she has to say and then LISTEN.
She may have some valid points, she may not.
Don't yell, argue or accuse.

Give her the option of bowing out gracefully if
you see that that is her intent. She will still
be responsible for the cost of her maids dress if
the dress has been ordered. That may tick her off
but that's the reality of the situation. You agree
to be in the wedding, you agree to the gig and its
costs. In the worst case scenario that she bows out,
you can negotiate with her about replacing her and
having the replacement maid reimburse her for the
cost of the maid's dress.

You can't please everyone in the wedding party, but
it helps if you put forth some effort. If she is
as troublesome as you say, you may not WANT her
in your wedding party.

For more information, check this out: Are You
A Maidzilla?

Email your wedding questions to: and
we'll do our best to consult with our
experts and give you the best answers!

Friday, January 25, 2008

Wedding Q, I'm a Nervous Bride

Got an email from a very nervous bride.
She asked, "Why am I so nervous about my wedding?
How do I calm down so that I can enjoy my wedding?"

Some gals confuse nervous with excited. Its normal to
be excited, its normal to have some level of nervousness.
But when the nerves and the stress take over, its time
to do some soul searching and get to the root of the cause.

Do you feel in your heart you are doing the right thing?
Are you 150% certain that this person is your soul mate
and the person you are destined to marry? If you answer
yes to these questions, you're OK.

Are you a control freak? Do you have to have to have
every detail perfect? Nothing is perfect, things can and
will go wrong. Most guests will never notice if one detail
is missing. If you are organized and have dependable
vendors servicing your wedding, learn to roll with it.
After all, its about the marriage and not about the party.

Take time to pamper yourself. Exercise, walk and do some
physical activity to help diffuse the stress. Yoga is a great
stress reliever and does wonders for the body. Eat healthy
foods and drink lots of water. Water helps the complexion
and you want to be glowing in your wedding photos.
Indulge in a massage and pedicure. Spend time planning
your new home. Have a girls weekend. And spend time
with your fiance having fun!

When wedding stress gets out of control, take a few days off
from wedding planning. Step back, take a deep breath and
renew yourself.

I've spent years counseling nervous brides and the
stress will fade as you get organized and take care of
yourself. Weddings have a way of coming together as the
parts become a whole. If you are still stressed out, seek
professional counseling from your minister, priest or rabbi
or a paid professional. Weddings should be fun!

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

The Wedding is Canceled, What Should I Do?

It happens, for one reason or another, a
wedding is canceled. Sometimes it's for the
best, sometimes it causes great pain and grief.
And sometimes, things work out and the wedding
is rescheduled.

The first step is to take time to grieve the
relationship. Regardless of whether it was your
idea and you know it is for the best, there is a
grieving process involved. Go with it, pull yourself
together as best you can and have help from family
members or friends to deal with the situation.

If the invitations are out, it will involve sending out
cancellation notices or use the good old grapevine.
You'll have to call people. Split up the guest lists
between your family members and just do it. It won't
be easy, but you have to let them know there is no
wedding. If the invitations haven't been sent, skip
this entirely. The word will spread without you
having to do anything.

You'll need to notify your vendors.
The wedding reception site, the dress shop,
the cake baker, the florist, the photographer,
the DJ and other vendors involved in your wedding.
You will in all probability lose your deposits.
You'll have to read your contracts to see each vendor's
details. Some vendors will refund some of the
deposit if they can find another wedding to fill the
date. Others won't. Wedding dresses are custom
ordered and you will have to take possession of the
dresses. The manufacturers won't take them back
under any circumstances because they are custom
ordered just for you.

You can have your wedding dress preserved
or you can store it at home. Turn it inside out,
hang it by the dress hangers so the dress doesn't
stretch, and store it in a breathable storage bag
or wrap a white sheet around the dress. Put in
in a place where there aren't any dramatic
temperature changes and the dress will be fine.
Or sell the dress. If the memories are too painful,
sell it and get it out of your life.

If you have non imprinted favors, you can sell them
along with other decorations. Try Ebay or post on
a wedding board and you'll sell them.

If the invitations are printed, take them to a recycle

You and the groom's family will need to decide
on financial responsibility for the outstanding bills.
If the groom called off the wedding, etiquette says
that he is responsible for a portion if not all of the

And finally, to quote the many times
married Zsa Zsa Gabor "Give back
the ring, dahling, but keep the diamond."

60's Tie Dye Trend Translates to Weddings

Style Dash says that the 60's trend of
tie dyed fashions is the hot spring trend
of 2008. The free flowing brightly colored
garments of the flower children are back.

You can translate the look to your wedding.
For the nontraditional bride with a fashion flare,
here are a few links to get the ideas flowing.

Cindy's wedding not only featured a tie dyed
wedding dress, but a tie dyed cake. So cool!

Jen Carter from has a lot
of tips on a tie dyed wedding gown. Click here.

Cassandra Bromfield offers tie dyed wedding
fashions for the bride.

For information on finding a dyer to dye your
wedding dress, click here. Very informative article!

And for a delicious tie dyed cheescake recipe
that will make your mouth water, you have to
go to Baking Delights. YUMMMMM. Wouldn't
this make a great bridal shower desert?

For those of you who want to tie dye
your own clothing, here are some
dvd's and books to help you feed
your wedding creativity!

Friday, January 18, 2008

Celebrity Wedding Fiascos, All that Expense & Its Over

Its no secret that I'm obsessed with celebrity
weddings. I like to see what people with money
to burn will spend to put on a party that trumps
every wedding known to man. They call in the top
wedding and celebrity stylists, they fly in flowers
by the plane load. Top chefs pack their saute pans
and fly to remote areas to cook for the masses.
Lets not forget the fashion stylists, makeup artists
and general go-fers who do all the grunt work to
make them look better than the average person.

Do they do it for publicity?
Do they do it for ego?
Do they do it to jump start a stagnant career?
Do they do it for love?
Does love and commitment even fit into the equation?

This weeks head smacker is Eddie Murphy and
Tracy Edmonds. Married symbolically, the marriage lasted
two weeks. The lavish south seas symbolic ceremony wasn't
legally binding. Gossip is swirling that Eddie screamed at her in front
of witnesses before the wedding cake was digested.

"After much consideration and discussion, we have jointly
decided that we will forgo having a legal ceremony as it is
not necessary to define our relationship further," said a
statement on behalf of both Murphy and Edmonds issued by
star publicist Arnold Robinson two weeks after the deed
was done..

"While the recent symbolic union in Bora Bora was
representative of our deep love, friendship and respect
that we have for one another on a spiritual level,
we have decided to remain friends," they said in their statement.

Doesn't this make you want to puke? Come on....what's the
thinking here? All I can think of is all the wasted cash.
And hurt feelings. One has to have very hurt feelings.

Do any of these marriages have a chance? Maybe they need
to get their face out of the clouds and put their feet
back on the ground. Marriage isn't a lavish party,
its a lifelong commitment. Its not a reason for a press release,
its not a reason to have your party blasted all over the
supermarket tabloids. To quote Dr. Phil, "Its time to get real."

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Wedding Trends We LOVE!

Since I've been talking about trends for
weddings, we have trends we actually
love. There are actually trends you should
investigate! Put it in your wedding plans,
tweak it to make it your own.

Lace wedding dresses, a return to femininity
after years of stiff satin and big embroidery
and big pearls embellishing wedding dresses.
We aren't talking about big tablecloth stiff
lace, the soft flowing laces that drape.

Unique wedding cakes that express the
individuality of the couple.

Photos from the Pink Cake Box
These cakes are just amazing!

Color on wedding dresses. Soft pinks, tiffany
blue, colored crystals. It can be a sash or an entire
soft pink gown. Set yourself apart
from the crowd by showing your sophistication
and style panache.

Colored shoes for the bride. We are seeing a lot
more silver, metallics and colored shoes
for the bride. No more uncomfortable satin
wedding shoes that blister your feet. Choose
a hot pair of cool shoes to complete your ensemble.
We recently had a bride wear a pair of red shoes
she bought in Europe with her cream colored gown.
She added ruby accessories and red roses. WOW!

Men's tuxedos are hot and looking better than
EVAH! We love the look of the Windsor ties
with a vest. Nix the shiny lime green vests , go
with something the men actually WANT to wear.

Invitations with personality. The selection of
what you can send is just amazing. If you can dream
it, someone can do it. We received a message invitation in
a bottle complete with sand and sea weed for a beach

Flowers and bouquets are amazing this year.
In addition to the hand tied bouquets with
"jewelry" on the stems, the flower combinations
are unique, colorful and make a statement.

Wedding Trends That Are SOOOO Overdone

Some wedding trends are beat to death and
deserve to die a natural death. Every trend
has a season, and its time for some of these
trends to be gone!

Every shade of brown on brown dresses
accented with gold. Brown whether you
call it cocoa, mocha or palamino with gold
trim is getting redundant. The wedding pictures
look drab. If you are going to do brown, accent
it with pink or tiffany blue to make the color

Cupcake trees instead of wedding cakes.
It was cute when it started, it was unique.
But a cupcake is a cupcake and a wedding
cake is the centerpiece of your reception.

Matchy matchy...a word coined by the
fashion mavens that makes me gag.
It means matching everything exactly.
Rouched skirt wedding dresses to
rouched skirt bridesmaid dresses.
There is a difference between coordination
and flow and matching exactly. Weddings
should flow.

Clone wedding dresses. A clone dress is a
copy of an original. Way too many bridal dress
companies are copying designs instead of coming up
with an original design. I see thousands of dresses a year
and they look alike to me. I WISH the dress
companies would come out with an original idea.
You'd have more choices in more price ranges.
Forgawdssake, hire a designer!

Not wearing a veil or headpiece with a formal
wedding dress. We hear I'm not used to wearing
anything on my head. DUH...we don't wear
veils on a daily basis! The veil frames the face and
balances the dress. Wear the veil for the wedding and
pictures and take it off for the reception.
The proper way to wear a veil is to let it
flow down the back and pulled across the

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Wedding Trends for 2008 That Scare Us!

Every year its a new trend in weddings. Some
are amazing, some are scary. Here's a few
we think are scary!

Wedding dresses with tiny puffed sleeves and
empire waistlines made of chiffon. YECHHHH!
These look like night gowns from an English
period movie. The look is stolen from the 60's,
when brides were marrying as innocent teens.
This style is young girlie and they aren't flattering
on anyone. The style is too young for today's
average aged bride and forgawdssake, they make
you look pregnant. And if you are pregnant, there
are dresses that will hide it.
The only thing worse is when the puffed sleeve is
topped by a ruffle.

Dressing up your dogs to be attendants at the
wedding. To quote Jay Leno, your dog isn't going
to wear that. No one loves dogs more than I do,
but I know my dogs wouldn't listen or behave in
front of a crowd. Maxx would bark, Tootsie would
get scared and have a panic attack and hide.
Look, dogs don't want to be at your wedding.
Dress up the dog and bring it to the shower
or reception, but not to the ceremony.

Using anorexic models in the wedding magazines.
One of the high end couture bridal magazines did a
spread using models that looked like they
hadn't eaten since the millennium. They were
in weird poses that were just scary. I didn't
notice the dresses at all. I saw hunger. With
today's problems with eating disorders,
what kind of message is this sending to women?

Knee length bridesmaid dresses. OK, they are cute,
so what is the problem? The problem is that your
maids aren't going to want to wear them knee length
which is technically the middle to the base of the knee.
Its not a real flattering look. They will want to hem
them above the knee.
So do you want your maids to show up at the wedding
with thigh to knee length dresses? I think not.
Stick with tea length or floor length dresses. I've
had more than one bride report back that knee length
dresses were a HUGE mistake.

Saturday, January 5, 2008

Wacked Out and Totally Weird Wedding Dresses

Here's a collection of some of my
favorite wedding dresses. Yes, they
are real. Totally not for the masses.

A bride in Russia. This is her
wedding get up. Reminiscent of
Pamela Anderson. Why is the
woman in black hiding her face?

A real super fan dress. It
had to be custom. I hope she
got free tickets to the game.

A Klingon wedding. Insert your comment

I love purple, but this is a little
too purple for my taste. Only for
the very individual bride. The top is
virtually nonexistent.

Red, very red but a great pose!

The condom wedding dress. Totally
fashioned out of condoms. For real.
The skirt is cute, the top is fugly.

Both dresses fashioned out
of toilet paper. Yup, another use
for Charmin. Not weatherproof,
don't advise wearing them in the
rain, either. For the disposable wedding. ;)

Oodles and Oodles of ruffles.
Reminds me of pink meringue.

Couture Wedding Dresses, How Ugly is Ugly?

Couture fashion is sometime a
head smacker. Couture dresses
are one of a kind made for the
runway to get the buzz going for
their line. Who would wear these
dresses? Probably no one and
they probably aren't being produced,
but they are current runway dresses.

It takes a special bride.
Are you that one bride?

Vera Wang's dresses. From the bag
lady line? Scary. Or maybe its the
hairdo that is scary. Or maybe its the
expressions on the faces of the models.
They look miserable.

The I forgot to put on the top of my
I've actually seen this dress, it looks
like a bustiere bra You can see through it
Save your money, buy a bra and a slip and
get the same look for about a hundred bucks.
Your future mother in law will have a heart
and you probably can't get into any church.
But you WILL be the center of attention.
Definitely a BOLD look.

I'm wearing the cake dress. So 80's.
Buy a dress at a resale shop for the
same look. Love the Madonna gauntlets
(fingerless gloves).

The black widow wedding dress.
This is so Anna Nicole, RIP.

This dress won't look good on anyone
unless you are as tall as Lebron James.
A total cha cha dress. The peplum is
80's, the skirt late 80's.

This dress is so 70's. It looks like
you are wearing your mom's wedding dress.
Her taste has to be better than this confection.

WTF? This looks like a costume
out of a Russian museum. Note the
head gear. Love the apron.

How ugly is ugly? Cut a hole
in the bodice of a dress and put a
clear plastic strap to keep the girls
in check. Horrible. Perfect for
the gals with "enhancements", who are
totally lacking in taste.

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Advice for The Bride To Be from the Blogosphere

Bride Diva puts an interesting spin
on her post 2008 Brides Get Ready

Bride Diva writes:
People Will Invite Themselves To Your Wedding
Honeymoon Registries are Tacky and Not Very Economical
It’s Not About The Gifts
Don’t Ask For Cash
Remember to Say Thank You

Always A Bridesmaid has a great list of
Resolutions forthe newly engaged.
I especially like #6, Resolve to see the big picture.
One of the best posts about keeping your
perspective on the wedding. Another must read!

Miss Jasmine at Weddingbee has her bridal resolutions
for the upcoming year.
More wedding planning resolutions at
Your Wedding Coach.

Aisledash has a funny post on Grooming the Groom.
Guys want to look picture perfect, too. I'm not
sure you can ask your hairy guy to wax his chest for
the wedding unless he's marrying shirtless.

Rhonda at Our Wedding Plus has a great
post: Nervous about that Wedding Speech?
You're not alone, this is a common fear that
we hear about all the time. Take a deep
breath and read this blog!
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